Severe Weather

UPDATE: We survived. Haven't checked the roof yet for wind damage, but grateful our prayers were answered. Sorry I am such a Debbie Downer.

One of my biggest fears is severe weather. As I write this, we have tornadic weather/damaging winds/large hail/flash flooding headed our way. If I could convince Thomas to move out of this area, I would - in a heartbeat - just for this reason. I sit here and am so afraid. I know God will take care of us in my mind, but my heart fears for Thomas, Callie, our unborn baby and our two dogs. Thomas sleeps peacefully and there is no way I can think about going to sleep until all of it is over. I have already put some items in our safest room - our camera, which holds pictures of all of our stuff for the insurance company, some other pictures, a few bottles of water and I have my cell phone in hand. I can't even explain to you how afraid I am of this type of weather. I grew up in earthquake country and the time we lived in the Texas panhandle before that, we had a basement and I knew we were safe. Here - I don't know. I would take an earthquake ANY day over this.

On top of watching the radar like a hawk and text messaging my sister when it is coming her way, I think of how this is just the tip of the iceberg for severe weather season. I had to do a story when I was in college (I was a Broadcast Journalism major, but I did a lot of writing for the ACU newspaper) about the beginning of severe weather season and how to stay safe. For me, as a Californian, it was relatively eye-opening. I think it worsened my fears. When Thomas and I lived downtown (in Sanger Lofts), I always felt very safe. I mean, we had a parking garage underground that was multi-level! A tornado sideswiped that building and they had mostly broken glass and that was it.

So, if someone can refer me to a counselor who can help me overcome my fears, that would be great. Just kidding. Well, maybe I am not. If we move, we MUST try to find a house with a basement. Tim H., if you ever read this, we need a house with a basement or a safe room!

All that being said, IF something does happen to us tonight, my will is not notarized yet, but my brother has a copy. I promise we mean every word of it. Also, I want an above-ground, upright headstone. Since Callie will be fine (because I will be shielding her with every bone in my body), make her take piano and guitar lessons and play soccer. Thomas knows all of this, but I suspect that if something happens to me, it will happen to him because he will probably be shielding ME with every bone in HIS body. Or, he may still be asleep on the couch. He can sleep through anything.

I told you - I am really scared. I'm not kidding. Am I alone?

Callie's Newest Hobby

IS there light at the end of the tunnel?

No.

I guess there is. In 6 months, I will probably not even remember exactly how sick I have been/am and will be thanking my lucky stars for a new little boy or girl in my life. Until the day comes that I am not sick, right now, I will wallow in my misery and PRAY, PRAY, PRAY that God has some mercy on my stomach and the new baby and allows me to have a day without sickness.

So, if you will, help me out. I need all of the prayers we can muster for the health of the baby and my sanity. I know some of you have been through this to this degree and I appreciate your support during this trying and NEVERENDING part of my pregnancy.

P.S. Remind me to go back and read this entry, if Thomas and I consider having another child after this one!!

UGH.

For those moms out there that suffered terrible morning sickness, worked full-time and were dealing with a toddler...give me some advice on how to deal with it! If my pregnancy with Callie was any indication of the morning sickness I am experiencing with this one, I expect to have it for another 2 weeks. HELP!

Drive-In

Thomas and I took Callie to a drive-in movie on Saturday night in Ennis. It was so much fun!! We loved it! It was my first drive-in and everything I anticipated. All of the screens have double features and it was only $6 per person. The food was great and reasonably priced and the sound through the radio was spectacular. Most importantly, Callie could scream at the top of her lungs and no one cared. If you haven't been to a drive-in, I would highly recommend it!

Foot In My Mouth

I am one of those people who have never been good with words. I can never find the right thing to say in hard circumstances and usually, I try to joke. I had two experiences of that nature this week.

First, a very close friend is having difficulties in her life. Things have been stressful with the kids and work and I think she was feeling a little off-kilter. After several weeks of noticing things weren't going well for her, I finally said something. It took me way too long to talk to her and I realize now that all she really needed was a friend. I am so much like a dude in those respects. I don't see things right in front of my face and I usually wait way too long to do something about it. Even as I was talking to her, I found it very difficult to find the right words to say and the right way to put into complete sentences what I was feeling in my heart. Fortunately, she knows me very well and has been around me enough to know this flaw in me. I hope she forgives my tardiness in being there for her.

Second, I think I was blindsided by PB's biopsy results. I know she is reading this, but I can't help but apologize for my initial reaction on the phone. I was so shocked that all I could do was make jokes. It is the worst defense mechanism, but it is me. My reaction was not only jokes, but it was telling her that if she needed comic relief to call me. I know people need that in times of adversity, but I wanted her to know how sad I was. She has to know that when I got off the phone with her, I sobbed. I didn't sob because I feel like things look bleak. On the contrary, I think things will be fine and, as she put it, she will get through it one step at a time and things will be fine. I sobbed because I hate that she has to go through this. I hate that she is feeling the emotional strain of dealing with breast cancer. I hate that we cannot take it on for her and share the burden she is feeling. I know God will take care of her, but part of me just can't figure out why this is happening and why now. It is not for me to ask why and I know I have to have faith and trust in God that He will heal her completely and quickly. I know I write about a lot of anger, but I am also thankful that it was caught now and that PB seems to be in pretty good spirits. Most importantly, I am thankful for her friendship and that she considers me one of the "girls."

At any rate, I am told that, if she has to have a more major surgery (hopefully, that won't be the case) KB has requested that she come out like Dolly Parton.

ARRRGGHHH!

(I wrote this last Thursday....)

Do you ever have those days when nothing seems to go right?? Today was one of those days for me! Fortunately, it ended on a good note with a nice meal with my parents and a quick and successful trip to Walmart!

So, I just came back to work and finished up a few things and then I decided to look at the videos in my phone (random, I know). I found this cute one from Thanksgiving last year and thought I would post it. It is of Callie and Pawpaw dancing to some fine country music! It reminds me of how precious the time is with family. Callie is so little in this picture and it seems like it happened yesterday. No matter how terrible my day is, she can always put a smile on my face.