Here we go!

I made a decision over the weekend.

I have, like many others I know, battled my weight for many years. I was a cheerleader for 9 years and spent most of it feeling like I was the heaviest girl on the squad. It didn't matter that I weighed about the same as the other girls or that I looked the same as them in our group pictures. I had always seen myself as being overweight and so, I thought I was. Then, I went to ACU and became even more depressed. I hated the heat and never went outside, thus my gain of more than 50 pounds from the beginning of my freshman year through my junior year. Then, I went to Weight Watchers for the first time. I went with my dear roommate and we did pretty good up until my wedding. I think I lost around 20 pounds and I felt better. Then, I became the Director of Singing Groups for ACU and spent the next two years on the road, eating out at every meal. Because we were relatively active, I only gained back about 10 of the 20 pounds I had lost. THEN, I moved to Fort Worth. I think that was my downfall. I became the ultimate couch potato. Thomas was working nights and I was working 12-15 hour days and when I was home, I was a permanent fixture on my love seat. Before I had Callie, I went back to Weight Watchers (2x) and lost a few. Then, I gained them back because I just didn't change myself. Since I moved and had Callie, I have gained 32+ pounds. Most of that happened before I had Callie, so I can't blame pregnancy. I have no excuse.

All that being said, I spent some considerable time in prayer and conversation with myself this weekend. I will be 30 on July 28.
I WILL NOT spend my 30's as I did most of my 20's.
I WILL NOT be exhausted when I walk up more than 10 stairs.
I WILL NOT over-eat every time I sit down at the table.
I WILL NOT take my health for granted.
I WILL NOT have my daughter grow up thinking her Mom is not healthy.
I WILL NOT impose healthy eating habits on my family and not do it myself.

I WILL be an example to Callie.
I WILL have more energy.
I WILL feel better about myself.
I WILL show my family and Thomas that I care about being here for another 60 years and I am not too lazy to take care of myself.
I WILL fit into a size 8.
I WILL pose for a picture without asking the photographer to either take it from a down-shooting angle or "hold on a second while I suck in."

I WILL SUCCEED.

My goal - 50 pounds by September 30, 2007.